part 2

Why does someone else hold the keys to my self-esteem? That’s the revelation I finally had after yet another disappointing quasi-relationship with someone. I have to continually hit the reset button on my life to make me consciously start making better choices. It’s hard to be in a relationship where there’s an imbalance of feelings. No one knows better than I do about me and because of that I don’t need anyone to validate me. I am free. Makes me feeling doltish of myself and my thoughts were too muddled. PDF, men don’t rate women for waggish(laughable). Men like skinny, mini, booby, girly girls. DUH! I’m certainly not starved for male’s attention. Some bitches I know are desperate for ‘em. ATTENTION TO THE MEN OUT THERE, DO NOT WRITE/SAY OUT PROMISES TO WOMEN THAT YOU CANNOT KEEP! And these make men can’t be trusted at any rate. Rome was not built in a day and also goes to relationships. Whatever happened the past just forget about it and never think of it anymore. Is there anyone for me to trust?? Well, after what happened ,I can hardly trust anybody. Just don’t jump into a relationship without knowing your partner. life isn’t that simple! Due to my philosophy, love while we can. laugh while we can, smile while we can, or else we might regret. as I said, life isn’t that simple though. if it is, every single day, I do not need to have my pale face around me all the time when I had difficulties. BE WISE TO CHOOSE A FRIEND! Or a PARTNER! Don’t just because you want fame, u will do whatever u like.
So sorry I didn’t update my journal for such a long time. I’ll be super busy after entering college. Depression and stress cannot be avoided. What I can think about at that stage is going to be God. I want to know and understand God. I guess I’m a girl who is easily get influence by others. BUT, trying hard to differentiate which is TRUE and FALSE, for sure. I always ask myself which place I can have peaceful mind just to lay down and think real hard to seek God or what I really want. But life isn’t that simple. Time doesn’t wait for me, past time cannot be found. I can’t just waste my time like that. What am I suppose to do? Answer: Just move on, my dear. One thing I know for sure that God will be always right beside to protect me and He, I shall worship and He, I will have my mind in peace. No doubt. As far as I know, the publicity now see outer look on a person, status, and races. God is in-charge in our life which I’ll give up my all for Him. Did u ask yourself who Jesus is? Or why He came. We should think of our responsibility to believe on Him and accept Him as My Saviour. Are you among the ones who ignore Him and reject Him? The choice is YOURS! Today , over 2000 years later, millions of people have no room for Jesus. Although they participate enthusiastically in the festivity of the christmas season, they keep Him out of their life. The NO VACANCY sign is there. Is there a room for a Christ in me? Humbly , I want to thank Ps. Jonathon David, Ps. Gan, Ps. Bee Ling and everyone that have been very supportive. They have influenced me to believe in God. Thank You. J
It hurts to know your hurting me. Because you’re so special in my heart. We can make it if we hold on and just be strong. But you don’t have any feelings for me anymore. Can we ever save this relationship or just friendship. Awkwardness had just happened between us. No idea WHY!! So close “ Jon McLaughlin”